Bigger Than This

It's Bigger Than This

The blog name "Bigger Than This" comes from a song I wrote and will share here.  Sometimes we can be so caught up in the midst of our own sufferings and struggles that we fail to see the bigger picture!  That's where I found myself a couple of years ago.  As a Christian, a wife & a mother to 3, I found myself in the midst of a devastating situation.  Of course I went through the usual grieving and questioning, and woe is me and it was with good reason I felt that way, as my life as I knew it had changed dramatically!  Uncertain of what I was to do from here and feeling that this was so unfair...I just continued to say and believe it had to be bigger than this.  There had to be more that can be said about my life than what seemed like trial after trial. 

As always, when I cried to God I was reminded that there is more than I can see, there's a bigger picture than I can't yet fathom, there's a God who understands, who grieves with me, who wants to take what's broken and turn it around for good.   I was reminded that someone may be watching...someone who may need to see me walking out my faith, someone who may just need to see me struggle yet cling to the hope I know is in Christ, someone who needs to see me hold fast to His promises, someone who needs to know Him as their Lord and Savior!  And so I wrote this little poem and the song below posted on my youtube page...neither of which follows the "rules" of rhyming and format and such but they were straight from my heart to God's...so I hope in someway it touches you.

I often fight the path He chose,

To my Father I cry on my knees in woe.

I spill my thoughts, my concerns, my cares,

How this way can't be right, it seems so unfair?

I'm reminded the wisdom I found thus far,

Came not in life's comforts but from out of the dark,

In a place I thought I'd never be, that's forced me to humility.

With my vision renewed I will carry on.  

Must view my life a sacrifice, the path with thorns brings joy unknown.

(excuse the video quality and words are below...)

Verse1: 

Tell me my life is bigger than this, than all of the cards life deals, Tell me my life is bigger than this, than all of the hurts I feel.

Chorus:

And though I cry to You, and question why to You, I still find, the only hope I have is YOU.  Is this my sacrifice to You, so that the world might see You...cause I can't see the way, quite like You do, so Jesus just pull me thru, cause I know that Your ways are bigger than this...

I know that your ways...they've gotta be bigger, more than this life, You're purpose is bigger...I know that your ways are bigger than this!

Ethiopia and My Mission Field

Hi everyone!  I started a new blog that will be geared more towards mom things, thoughts, bargains, recipes and funny stories about kids of course!  Below is the first post I put on it...but I'm putting it here too as my link to my new blog isn't working (I'll get it up soon).  This existing blog will be changing slightly a simple name change and posts with more my thoughts, music, devotionals, but less mommy stuff for those who, well...aren't moms :-)  So on to my post...

I have a cousin who Adopted a baby from Ethiopia last year...he's back in Ethiopia with his church trying to find a place they can partner with in order to begin helping other kids and finding sponsors, possibly adoptive parents for some!  I look at the pictures (which I'm hoping they won't mind I borrowed :-) and it breaks my heart yet gives me hope all at the same time!  I hope you'll read all the way thru, especially if your a MOM :-)

The girl in the picture below (to the left) is 18 and has to prostitute herself to eat and feed her child.  The little boy being held is only 7 and lives on the streets.  Many other street kids are repeatedly raped and abused & end up with AIDS because of it.

                

The little boy with the sores on his face below is living with AIDS.  But then look at the beautiful faces and smiles none-the-less, the eyes, the innocence. 

 

It can be tough to see...especially if you're like me and want to fly off on a whim and try to figure out how you can adopt them all and save the world! 

You see, I have dreams to reach people using the gifts God's given me, music, writing and such.  I'm often getting caught up in a new business venture so that I can make some extra money to do those things or just because I'm an entrepreneur at heart.  I have hopes of doing something that seems important.  So when I see others reaching across the globe, doing what they've been called to do it can make me feel so helpless or useless sitting here in my comfortable house, just getting thru the daily grind of laundry, dishes, paying bills, grocery shopping, taking kids to and fro.  I want to feel important like I've done something significant like I accomplished something that will touch others!  

Then I'm always reminded that not everyone can travel the world, not all can be out there on the streets saving the lost, writing the next best seller or recording the next Christian CD.  Some of us are called to a task just as big if not bigger, one that requires self-sacrifice, patience, and wisdom, one that you will likely never be recognized or praised for...it is the calling of MOTHERHOOD!

I'm reminded that I may not be on the mission field but my task is equally important. I'm hopefully raising 3 kids that then can go from here and BE the next missionary, Christian singer, Pastor, Leader, teacher & more.  I'm hopefully displaying for them a hunger for Christ, helping them to see Him in all things, giving them the tools they need to discern truth from lies.  My task is one filled with challenges everyday.  One where I can share with them the stories of these orphans & other children around the world and teach them to pray for them. Hopefully I can fan the flames of their hearts to be moved towards the things of God and toward His purposes for them.

Though this world doesn't value my ministry...though it tells me as a mom I can still do it ALL...I believe that I CAN do it all, but I know I cannot do it all WELL!  So I pray often that the Lord would show me what I need to take on and what needs to be left alone!  I boldly ask Him to cut off whatever gets in the way of the perfect plan He has for me & for my family.  When my job is over I want to know I did my best, I don't want to have regrets or be weighed down by guilt. 

These are the thoughts that keep me motivated.  Though I get tired, frustrated, my house dirty with fingerprints, my wallet empty, my energy drained, my patience worn thin, my life not my own...this IS my mission field!  Though no one may notice the significance but me...it will all be worth it one day and God willing there will be time for the rest!